Independence Day Alternatives


Not feeling very patriotic? While the rest of the country is decorating in red, white and blue and singing “God Bless America”, you don’t have to hide in the house. Here are some suggestions for celebrating other July 4th anniversaries.

1) Assassination of the Imperial Romanov family (1918). This one actually occurred on July 17 but it’s July 4th according to the Julian calendar, which the Russian Orthodox Church continues to use. Anyway, you can honor this anniversary on either day you choose. Appropriate celebrations would include eating borscht and caviar and drinking vodka and doing that funny Russian dance.
Romanov family
Romanov family (from l to r) dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead, dead

2) The Beatles chased out of the Philippines barely escaping with their lives (1966). The Fab Four managed to insult Imelda Marcos by declining a breakfast invitation and were attacked and run out of the country by an angry mob. John Lennon is quoted as saying “If we go back, it will be with an H-bomb. I won’t even fly over the place.” So much for Mr. “Give Peace a Chance.” Depending on how you feel about the Beatles you could a) hold a non-stop marathon playing of “Rubber Soul” and “Revolver” the two albums the band was promoting on their tour of Asia. OR b) Feast on the Philippine national dish Lechon, a spit roasted suckling pig traditionally served with a (mouth watering) thick liver sauce. Other suggestions: Adopt the word Imeldific, a word that Marcos tried to coin herself. “I was born ostentatious. They will list my name in the dictionary someday. They will use Imeldific to mean ostentatious extravagance.”
Philippine National dish Lechon. Interesting note: Beatle’s song Piggies, record label, Apple – hmm.

3) This one’s REALLY lame because I came up with it when I saw Sid Vicious listed as a July 4th birthday. Turns out it’s not Sid Vicious of the Sex Pistols but WRESTLER Sid Vicious. Anyway, I like the idea of a Sid Vicious Day which could be celebrated by singing both versions of “God Save the Queen” – which would not only honor the man of the day but also signify disapproval of the National Holiday. Anyway, that’s my personal plan for today.
Sid Vicious prince of punk and Sid Eudy (AKA Sid Vicious) wrestler

4) One more suggestion for being subversive. Celebrate a BRITISH holiday. Tynwald Day is July 5th (close enough). It’s a holiday celebrated on the Isle of Man by switching the location of the meeting of legislature. “Tynwald, meets at St John’s, instead of its usual meeting place in Douglas. The session is held partly in the Royal Chapel of St John the Baptist and partly in the open air on the adjacent Tynwald Hill (a small artificial mound).” Sounds like fun. As much fun as barbecues and fireworks – maybe not. But, if you’re a real Anglophile you could stand on a small artificial mound and wave the Isle of Man flag. Just a suggestion.
Weird Isle of Man flag. What does it mean?

Here’s a bonus “fun fact” On July 4 1866 a firecracker thrown in the woods started a fire that destroyed half of Portland Maine. It’s all fun and games until the town burns down.

Enjoy the 4th!

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