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Claudia Myers column: Coping with the white stuff

Poor us. Right? Anybody who endures 50-below-zero wind chill and lake-effect blizzard conditions has an undeniable right to complain.

A kid jumping off a snow hill while other kids climb and play on it.
This euphoria might last for a couple days, then it’s on to the coping part of winter and snow, which we do until late March.
Dan Williamson / 2024 file / Duluth Media Group

There’s an old Minnesota saying that goes, “Big snow, little snow. Little snow, big snow." It means if the flakes are big and you feel like you are in a Disney snow globe, it will stop snowing pretty soon. If the flakes are small, especially if they are blowing sideways, get yourself prepared, because that’s what’s known as a blizzard.

Minnesotans have learned to deal with snow. Duluthians drive a zig-zag path down our slippery hills, flat on a “street” for one block, down one block on an “avenue," over one more street, down another avenue, and so on.

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We have learned to walk on the sidewalks on the snow and not on the shiny parts known as “black ice.” We hang on to things such as parking meters, car door handles, buildings, fences and each other so we don’t tip over.

Canada geese in snowstorm
Canada geese hunker down in near-blizzard conditions April 4, 2023, in Two Harbors.
Clint Austin / File / Duluth Media Group

We keep our car gas tanks full and our emergency kits handy in the trunk, with blankets, a shovel, box of salt, bandages and chocolate. We try to not eat the chocolate before we get stranded. We have adapted.

I have been in Baltimore, twice, when it has snowed and I was the only one walking to work. Those native Marylanders know what they are about. They go inside and stay there until that icky stuff goes away. Of course, they do. They don’t have snow shovels or snowplows. Snow shovels? They don’t even have snow boots.

I recently got a short video from one of our kids who has become an avid North Carolinian, proving to me that once a Minnesotan, always a Minnesotan. It was a short clip of their golden retriever romping around in their backyard, which appeared to have about an eighth of an inch of white “something” covering the pine needles. But the caption read, in huge capital letters, “WE GOT SNOW!”

If you are from an area that gets “serious snow,” you know exactly how excited they were.

“Omigosh! It’s snowing! I have to put on all my winter gear and go out there and walk around in it! Right now!”

We stick out our tongues to catch the snowflakes as if they are going to have some exotic flavor that we’ve never tasted before.

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We build snowpersons, slide down slick, white hills on our skis or sleds or scoot down the street in our big old Sorel PAC boots.

We shovel, snowblow or sweep the stuff into piles, depending on how much there is.

4 year old makes snow angels on the ground
Livi Kovala makes a snow angel Nov. 25 at Hartley Park in Duluth.
Wyatt Buckner / 2024 file / Duluth Media Group

Our kids and grandkids burrow through the piles of snow, building forts and igloos.

We call out to the neighbors, “Cold enough for ya?”

This euphoria might last for a couple days, then it’s on to the coping part of winter and snow, which we do until late March. During this time, we grumble and complain about the wind chill, the icy roads, our sidewalks that have disappeared as if they never were there, and the parking lots that are a fraction of their size due to the heaps of road scrapings from the snowplows.

Out of hundreds of proposed names, the near-winning suggestion in the contest came from a 4-year-old.

We complain about how much longer it takes to go anywhere, especially if you have a herd of toddlers who need help layering their layers.

We complain about the weight of the snow on our roofs and put on our best “woe is me" attitude as we envision the monster potholes that await us when the snow finally melts.

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Poor us. Right? Anybody who endures 50-below-zero wind chill and lake-effect blizzard conditions has an undeniable right to complain. Right?

Nah. We’re Minnesotans, even if we’re from Wisconsin or North Dakota, and as Minnesotans, we learn to cope. You can believe me or not, but I say there are even things we are grateful for. You just have to think hard about it.

Man snow blows driveway.
A Proctor resident uses a snowblower to clear a path Dec. 15, 2022.
Wyatt Buckner / File / Duluth Media Group

Here’s one: You remembered where you stored your favorite pair of winter boots last spring — the Swedish ones with the cleats on the soles. And, if that wasn’t relief enough, inside one of them was the missing mate to your insulated, warm and toasty driving glove, so you no longer have to keep your right hand in your pocket while driving with your left.

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Isaac Ortman, 14, plans to keep his streak going, winter and summer — maybe for years longer.

Or, you found the ticket stub from the dry cleaners which jogged your memory about where your winter coat might be. I’m grateful we got the spring bulbs in before the squirrels noticed what we were up to. All good.

Think about all the interesting things you have been looking forward to doing, if you only had the time to do them. Well, you’re snowed in. You have time now.

You can binge-watch "Project Runway" or re-read all of the John le Carré books you have on hand.

You can bake until you run out of flour. Then you can eat all the things you baked.

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You can make soup. Soup is always good and you can make it from whatever you have in the house, except Spam. Take it from me — Spam isn’t good soup material.

The gardening catalogs have started arriving. You can get out pencil and graph paper, cut up the catalogs and plan your dream garden for next summer, when it is warm again.

I’m not going to visit lutefisk. It gets so much ridicule each year I think people are getting as tired of hearing about it as they are of eating it.

Get out the dreaded boxes of photographs and see if there’s any way possible to sort and organize them.

Make something to give away when you can get out again: pot holders, knitted socks, a bird feeder.

Go on YouTube and learn how to quilt. Or play the banjo.

See? No need to sit by your sunlamp and sulk.

But, if you just cannot do another dang snowy winter, we won’t disown you. Just send us a postcard from Sarasota, please.

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Claudia Myers is retired from costume design and construction for The Baltimore Opera and the Minnesota Ballet. She is a national award-winning quilter, author and local antique dealer, specializing in Persian rugs. Her book, "The Storyteller," is available at claudiamyersdesigns.com.
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